Use The Forks – Star Wars Cooking

USE THE FORKS!
Star Wars Cooking

Scariest Star Wars bad guy? For me, it’s Darth Maul. He’s creepy-looking, he’s got a double-bladed light saber, an oddly soothing voice, and he always seems to appear out of nowhere! His theme music (not “Duel of the Fates,” but the whispery, hissing one) is pretty scary too. I’ll admit that his story takes a strange arc in Clone Wars (C’mon… Who can survive being cut in half?!), but his insane lust for revenge and creepy, garbage-spider body makes him even more terrifying. Poor Satine!

The fact that he’s part of an intricate, secret, diabolical plan that has been in motion for a while, is also unsettling. If anybody could bully me into carrying out Lord Sidious’s wishes, it would be Darth Maul. But… only if he lets me ride on his cool scooter first.

In the spirit of the season, here’s a recipe inspired by the Star Wars character that scares me the most. See you in my nightmares, Maul.

Darth Maul Balls

Makes 40 balls

Ingredients:
  • 1 box Red velvet cake mix, prepared in a 9″X9″ cake pan, and cooled to room temperature
  • 1 (8oz) package cream cheese, room temperature
  • 1/2 cup mini chocolate chips
  • 2 bags Black candy melts
  • 1 bag Red candy melts
  • 10 butterscotch candies, crushed (a food processor works best for this)
Directions:
1. Line a baking sheet with wax paper, and set aside.
2. Crumble a prepared red velvet cake into a large bowl.
3. Add cream cheese and mini chocolate chips, and stir until well combined.
4. Scoop the mixture out by rounded tablespoonfuls, and roll into 1″ balls, placing them on your prepared baking sheet.
5. Once you’ve used up all of your cake mixture, chill the balls in the fridge for about 30 minutes.
6. While your balls are chilling, nuke the black candy melts in a microwave-safe bowl at 30 second intervals, stirring after each interval.
7. Using a fork, dip each cake ball into the melted black candy melts, and place back on the wax paper.
8. Place candy-coated cake balls back into the fridge for another 15 minutes.
9. While they’re chilling, nuke the red candy melts in a microwave-safe bowl at 30 second intervals, stirring after each interval.
10. Drizzle each candy-coated cake ball with melted red candy.
11. Immediately sprinkle each one with crushed butterscotch candies, and place them back in the fridge until the candy is hardened, about another 30 minutes.

12. Remove from the fridge and enjoy while wielding a double light saber. Happy Halloween!!

Use The Forks – Star Wars Cooking

USE THE FORKS!
Star Wars Cooking

by Kathy Bejma

Porgs.
What are they? Space penguins? A Nuisance? Food? What I know for sure about them is that they’re super cute, and I like their style.
Along with the caretakers, they seem to be native to Ahch-to where Luke is avoiding everyone and growing his beard. It also appears that at some point they waddle onto the Millennium Falcon, and hilarity ensues. I can’t wait.

I may not know a whole lot about Porgs, but I’m positive that I’ve got Porg fever, and I’ve got it bad! My suggestion to anyone else suffering from the same affliction, is to eat several of these Porg-asbord cookies, and wait for December 15th.

Porg-asbord Cookies

Makes about 30
Ingredients:
  • 2 sticks unsalted butter, room temperature
  • 3/4 cup sugar
  • 1/2 cup powdered sugar
  • 2 egg yolks
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
  • 2 1/2 cups flour, separated
  • 3 Tablespoons cocoa powder
  • brown mini M&Ms
  • black candy melts
  • yellow candy melts
Directions:
1. In the bowl of an electric mixer, beat the butter and both sugars together.
2. Add egg yolks one at a time, mixing well after each one.
3. Add vanilla and continue to beat until well combined.
4. Divide the mixture into 3 equal parts.
5. Remove 2 of the 3 parts, and place into a separate bowl, and set aside.
6. In the bowl with 1/3 of the original mixture, add 1 cup flour and mix until a dough forms. Set aside.
7. To the bowl with 2/3 of the original mixture, add 1 1/4 cups + 2 Tablespoons flour, and the cocoa powder. Mix until well combined.
8. Place the vanilla dough on a piece of plastic wrap. Roll the dough so it forms a log with a 2 cm diameter.
9. Take your chocolate dough and sandwich it between two pieces of plastic wrap.
10. Using a rolling pin, roll out the dough into a 1.5 cm thick rectangle that’s as long as the vanilla dough log.
11. Now use your rolling pin to flatten the sides of the chocolate rectangle. The middle should remain thick, and the sides should be thinner so that they can wrap around the vanilla dough log. The thick part of the chocolate dough will be the Porg’s head.
12. Place the vanilla dough log on top of the thick part of the chocolate dough, and wrap the thinner sides of the chocolate dough around the vanilla log.
13. Use your fingers to smooth out the crease.
14. Cover the entire log in plastic wrap and refrigerate for about 15 minutes.
15. Preheat your oven to 325 degrees F. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper.
16. Once the dough is chilled and firm, remove it from the fridge and slice it into 1/4 inch thick pieces.
17. Place each cookie on a prepared baking sheet.
18. Add two mini M&Ms for eyes, and place your cookies back into the fridge to chill for 10 minutes.
19. Once your cookies have finished cooling, place them in the oven for 12-15 minutes.
20. Allow your cookies to cool on the baking sheet for 5 minutes before removing to a wire rack to cool completely.
21. Once your cookies have finished cooling, place the black candy melts into a microwave-safe bowl, and nuke at 30 second intervals until completely melted, stirring after each interval.
22. Repeat with yellow candy melts.
23. Using a piping bag or tooth pick, draw a frowny face and two wings on each cookie with the melted black candy.
24. Use the melted yellow candy melts to pipe or draw two feet on each cookie.
25. *Porg noises*

Use the Forks! – Star Wars Cooking

USE THE FORKS!
Star Wars Cooking

by Kathy Bejma

Thee in luck! This month’s recipe is in honor of Tatooine’s most loveable scumbag, Watto. He’s a mind-trick-proof, elephant-nosed, gambler that knows a lot more than outlanders might think (even if Qui-Gon did outsmart him).
His small junk shop sells everything from a T-14 Hyperdrive Generator to moobian torsion valves. But republic credits aren’t good enough for this Toydarian, only real money!!
Okay… He did own slaves (I said he was a scumbag!) but he wasn’t cruel to Anankin and Shmi. He gave them their own home, and even let little Ani off work early sometimes. And technically, he won them from Gardulla the Elder so it’s really those gangster Hutts that are the problem.
This recipe features black and blueberry gelato with shortbread cookie wings and chocolate jimmies to represent Watto’s beard stubble. If you’re a bigger fan of Attack of The Clones Watto, feel free to use some of the leftover shortbread dough to make a little hat.
Living on Tattooine can be tough, so why not take a break from roasting beneath two suns to enjoy a delicious bowl of Watto Gelato? It’s much more refreshing than a Klatooine paddy frog, probably.
Watto Gelato
Makes 1/2 gallon
Ingredients:
For the Gelato:
  • 2 cups fresh blueberries
  • 1 cup fresh blackberries
  • 1 1/4 cups sugar, divided
  • 2 Tablespoons lemon juice
  • 2 cups milk
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla
  • 3 egg yolks
  • 1 egg
  • 1 cup heavy cream
For the cookie wings:
  • 2 sticks butter, room temperature
  • 1 cup powdered sugar
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla
  • 1/4 teaspoon almond extract
  • 2 cups all-purpose flour
  • chocolate jimmies
Directions:
1. Place the blueberries, blackberries, 1/2 cup sugar, and lemon juice in a food processor and puree until smooth. Set aside.
2. Set a saucepan over medium heat, add the milk and vanilla extract and bring to a simmer. Do not let it boil! It will curdle!
3. While your milk is heating up, whisk together the egg yolks, egg, and 3/4 cup sugar in a medium-sized bowl, until thickened and pale yellow.
4. Very slowly whisk a small amount (about 1/2 cup) of the hot milk mixture into the egg and sugar mixture, to temper the eggs.
5. Slowly whisk the tempered egg mixture into the milk mixture on the stove.
6. Stir constantly until the mixture thickens slightly, just at the point of simmering. Again- Do not let it boil.
7. Remove the pan from the heat. Pour the custard into the bowl of an electric mixer, and let it cool slightly for a few minutes.
8. Add the cream and beat well with a whisk attachment.
9. Add the berry mixture and mix well again.
10. Cover with plastic wrap and chill overnight in the fridge (or for at least 4-6 hours).
11. While the mixture is cooling, make the cookie wings:Preheat the oven to 300°F. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper, and set aside.
12. In the bowl of an electric mixer, beat together the butter, sugar, vanilla, and almond extract.
13. Add the flour 1/2 cup at a time, beating well after each addition. If your mixture is extremely dry and crumbly (humidity in the air can greatly affect this recipe) dribble in up to 1 tablespoon of water until it comes together. This is a stiff dough.
14. Take a portion of the dough, and roll it out to about 1/4″ thickness.
15. Using a wing-shaped cookie cutter, cut out several wings and place onto your prepared baking sheet.
16. Use a fork to prick the wings all over to allow steam to escape as they bake.
17. Place your wings into the oven and bake for 20 minutes, or until the edges are light brown on top.
18 Allow wings to cool on the pan for 10 minutes before removing to a wire rack to cool completely.
19. Once your gelato mixture is completely cool, pour it into an ice cream/gelato maker and follow the manufacturer’s instructions.  My ice cream maker takes about 30 minutes.
I also recommend putting your finished gelato in the freezer for about an hour to let it really harden up before you try to scoop it.
20. To serve: Place several scoops of gelato into a bowl.
21. Add two wings and then sprinkle the bottom of each scoop with chocolate jimmies.
22. Enjoy while betting on a pod race.